Hubby Guy’s Buoy

I have mentioned my Hubby Guy again and again for years but he has never gotten to be the topic of a post. We have been married for 16.25 years. Since I have been sharing about buoys I cling to when I find myself separated from the safety of my mental boat, this is the perfect time to write about him.

          We got married when I was 32 and he was 39. We were both really good at being single and had pretty much decided we would remain that way forever. We were set up long distance by a mutual friend. We are very different, but we are also perfectly matched. We hit it off instantly and never looked back.

     I always dated pretty boys with no brain. I’m not sure why I thought that was my type. One of my best friends always says, “Marry a nerd. They make the best husbands.”  She is 100% correct. Hubby Guy is an organic chemist. When he talks shop all I hear is eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…. I hear words coming out of his mouth but none of them land on any receptors in my brain. They fly right over my head and I love it. My friend found me a handsome fella with a brain and I will be forever grateful.

     It seems to me that so many conversations about marriage turn to how hard it is. You don’t have to try at all to find spouses trashing each other. Marriage gets lots of negative press. My experience has been anything but negative. We are two peas in a pod. I theorize we work well together because we were single for so long. We had long enough to figure ourselves out. Neither one of us needed to be completed.  We married as whole people. As different as we are, we are alike in all the right ways. That has made for a really blissful marriage. In our relationship we celebrate and allow space for our individuality. That space makes us closer.

     The past 16.25 have taken us through lots of ups and downs. If there is one thing I am certain of here on earth, it is that Hubby Guy has my back. Whether I encounter craziness out in life somewhere or we encounter it together, he is absolutely a buoy I cling to.

     Who is the person in your life that is always there when you need a stabilizing force? That person doesn’t have to be a spouse or even a significant other. We need people close to us. We weren’t intended to be islands. I think one of the most significant things we can do for ourselves is let others in so we don’t have to fight through life alone. There is absolute magic in finding the right people to do life with.  

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