I was sitting at a light this week and in one of the lanes of cross-traffic I saw a really sporty, red trike motorcycle. In the passenger seat sat the largest teddy bear I have ever seen. It made my day. I grabbed my phone and took a picture. It turned out too grainy to share with you. You will just have to take my word for it. It was a sight!        

     The spectacle jump-started me thinking about the odd things we have relationships with. Right now in my basement sits a giant, blue gorilla. He moved in several years ago. The picture of how he came home is what I have shared with you. He was won at the fair (I think) by my girls’ Nana. He was gifted to my children. I suspect he was gifted to the children because what adult wants a giant fair gorilla in their house? He doesn’t match the décor of any house I have ever been in, including mine.

     My youngest moved out very recently. Guess what she left behind? You got it, the gorilla. So, he is perched on a cooler in the basement…awaiting his fate. Neither child wanted to take him. When I told the youngest that I plan to feed him to the dump monster, she was very upset. She forbid me to trash him. She feels like I should want him to live with me forever, I guess.

     Also in my basement right now is a Strawberry Shortcake Apricot Nectar doll that I got in third grade. She is the only doll I ever cared about. 39 years later, she is missing her hat and one of her shoes. All of her yummy apricot nectar smell is long gone.  She lives in a bin with some of my stuffed animal hoard from the same era. There is no reason at all to keep that stuff. Nevertheless, they are down there.     

     We get attached to things for all sorts of reasons. Most of us have at least one box or bin of keepsakes. There is nothing wrong with that. It is fun, every once in a while, to haul it out and recapture the whimsy or find joy in the memories of days past. I just think there is a line.

     My mother died 4 years ago. I am still slowly picking through her belongings. I have found the oddest items. For most of them, I have no idea why she kept them. I have kept a few things. The rest I have distributed to the best recipient. I found one thing, though, that I have thought often about. In her wallet was a small folded piece of tattered paper. Years ago, she shared with me that when she was very young her parents checked her into the hospital to receive surgery to fix her heart issue. The child before her getting the same procedure died on the operating table. Upon hearing that, her parents checked her out immediately. Her father paid $20 cash for services rendered and took her home. She held onto the receipt her entire life. She told me she kept it because it reminded her of how close she came to getting help and that help was denied by her father. I never asked her if she considered her father may have saved her life that day. She seemed bent on remaining bitter.    

     Yes, that story is sad. I tell it because we should consider the odd things we drag around with us. I held in my hands a 65ish-year-old piece of paper that my mother carried around in her wallet to remind her of what she decided was an injustice in her life. She did not die that day. She lived, against all odds, for 70 years. She knew all three of her children as adults and all four of her granddaughters adored her. All of that may have only been possible because of my grandfather’s decision to take her home that day. She refused to let the injustice go. I have thought a lot about how much the bitterness she hung onto stole from her. She may have lived even longer if she had all the energy back that she fed to the bitterness for 60 years.

     We have not been promised that life will be easy. Sometimes, we may need to take a giant teddy bear for a ride on a motorcycle. We may need to use a giant blue fair gorilla as a backrest for a few years. We may collect a few important things to use as memory mile-markers in our journey through life. It is a bad idea, however, to harbor bitterness, anger, and unforgiveness. We need to let that stuff go. It is guaranteed that bad things will happen in our lives. We are going to disagree with decisions made for us. We are going to make some bad choices of our very own. Either way, injustices will occur by us and to us. Let’s learn from it, but leave it. There is no need to drag it around for years.

     As for my doll and her company… that box is first in line for redistribution on my next purge day. I will feed her happily to the dump monster. She brought me joy, but it is time to let her go. The stuffies will get fluffed in the dryer and sent to Goodwill. They have served their intended purpose for me and can move on. What in your life is ready for redistribution?

Ecclesiates 3: 1-8 (ASV) “For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven: ² a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; ³ a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; ⁴ a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; ⁵ a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; ⁶ a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; ⁷ a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; ⁸ a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.”