My own thoughts hold me hostage. Not long ago someone delivered a gentle reminder of this truth in the form of a comment. She complimented me, but it left me perplexed. So, I reached out to someone who knows me well to help me untangle my thoughts on the matter. Her response to me lead to a really needed a-ha moment about how we impact people by being authentic, imperfect humans. Turns out we can bring light and energy to a space even when we feel like we should be voted least likely to succeed.
I shared before that I participate regularly in CrossFit classes. A little more than 8 years ago I decided to find a mode of fitness I enjoy. All these years later I still have a love-hate relationship with it. I love feeling strong but hate that I will never win at every aspect of it. The comparison train squishes me daily. I show up every weekday like clockwork but feel ancient and irrelevant in a place typically filled with much younger people.
At CrossFit last week, a new girl turned to me and said something like I plan to watch you. I impressed her. Immediately, I felt confused. As I said before, I think of myself as ancient and irrelevant. Why in the world would someone want to get their cues from me? After processing with a friend, I understood the new girl sees strength. She sees another woman taking care of herself. My relevance to her has little to do with fitness and more to do with commitment and a little kindness. A-ha!
Where do we get the idea that we can only make a difference in the lives of others when we rule the room? Does it go back to grade school where the popular kids made all the decisions? Is it from pressure in high school to pick a successful career path? We get herded toward everyone else’s expectations. Meanwhile, our natural inclinations and intrinsic feelings of value take a hit. No wonder we struggle. Or is it just me?
Wherever you find yourself, give yourself a break from the expectations of others. Understand that you have tons of value. You influence your realm, even when you feel you should be voted least likely to succeed.
Love this! Great perspective.
“We get herded toward everyone else’s expectations.” This is a great observation. Who has that right? Parents do at times in rearing their children. But the Lord is the only one that I think has a right to lead us to better relationships and interpersonal actions. OF course, I am a rebel. Our society puts requirements on us that are not useful or edifying.