How often does your outcome suffer because of fear of missing out? Do you train yourself negatively, like I do, by allowing distractions or entertaining other options mid-activity? I make life harder than it needs to be.
He sat there sharing his heart with me and I felt torn. I heard muffled conversation coming from the room to my left. Fear of missing out pulled my focus away. Never before have I wanted so much to be in two places at once. Instant conviction grabbed me. The term double-minded came to mind as if I had the bandwidth for yet another distraction. Is triple-minded a thing?
Merriam-Webster defines double-minded as “wavering in mind: UNDECIDED, VACILLATING or marked by hypocrisy: INSINCERE”. That definitely describes what happened in my mind in those moments. I waited weeks for the conversation in the den, but I desperately wanted to know what was being said in the kitchen. My mind wavered a good bit. I felt like a complete heel for not giving 105% of my attention to the person in front of me.
The term double-minded is used in the Bible (James 1:8). In the passage James is discussing asking God for wisdom. He says we should ask in faith and not doubt. In other words, ask God expecting only Him to provide the wisdom and guidance you need. He wants our complete focus. He wants to be and is actually our best option.
Apparently, people in AD 48 struggled like people of AD 2022 with wanting to cover our bases in every possible way. We believe God can do it but wonder if He will. So, we entertain the notion that perhaps a better option exists. Because God feels mysterious, we go ahead and devise a human wisdom-based backup plan …just in case. We keep our options open.
My question for all of us is this: How many times have we gone ahead with our “just in case” plan? How often does our own double-mindedness keep us from hearing from the Lord in the first place? Ouch and double ouch, right? Or is it just me?
6 But let him ask in faith without doubting. For the doubter is like the surging sea, driven and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord, 8 being double-minded and unstable in all his ways.
James 1: 6-8 (CSB)
The conversation I had in the den fell flat and the fault lies with me. It just so happens the Lord’s ways were the topic of conversation. What if God’s wisdom for me right then was coming from the mouth of the person in the same room? My double-mindedness blocked the wisdom and guidance I claim to crave.
Most likely, James was not speaking about fear of missing out. And, maybe my hypothesis here is a little muddy. Think with me, though. Isn’t fear of missing out, at the heart of it, just doubt that you have chosen correctly? Isn’t it the feeling that another option may be better?
I need to do a better job of patiently focusing my attention. The interaction I shared is harmless enough. The example provided, though, preaches to me. We unintentionally train ourselves in doubt. Our outcomes suffer because we, like James’ audience, refuse to be single-minded in our faith.
What steps can you take in your life right now to train single-mindedness? How can you practice proper focus with regard to depending on God for wisdom and guidance?